820222 - Stormy

Where shall I start? Ermm .. today I spent my entire hours working on the net. Not literally working, but just monkeying around. I got no class today. (So Free???) I started the day by waking up at 8:30 AM. Ok la, usually if don’t have class I wake up around 9:30 the earliest. Guess what I did? Yeah .. do some hand exercise on the new housemate, the PS2 .. testing my luck on WE 9. (Winning Eleven). Today was rather boring I would say. I have nothing much to do. I decided to take a break from what I always do. Like going to ASAYO on Wednesday. I feel like and really really feel like letting go of KLCC. I don’t know why. Nothing have to do with the meeting cancelation la. I just feel like, after this, I need to have more time for myself .. doing what I wanted to do but cannot because of work, not really work but responsibilities. I’ve not been attending my Korean extra classes because of the meetings and activities that I have. Not that I’m saying KLCC has did something bad to me but .. it’s really compulsory for me to attend at least 5 sessions and to date, I only attended 1. Swell … about making decisions and today was a bit .. I don’t know what to say la.

Without realizing, I’ve been with KLCC for around 3 years now. WOW! - Damian and Anand must be impressed "How can you do that man? It’s amazing". A lot of people just can’t stand to be inside. I’ve heard a lot of stories about the though part, admin .. yeah. I think everywhere is more or less the same. Just that you need to get used to it to master it. I’m not saying I’m mastering it but I’m learning and I think I’m coping fine with things. I do hope that the person who will be sitting on my chair next time will be able to bring more sparks and do better than me. Please don’t runtuhkan what I’ve built! I’ll kill you …

So I`ll hold you tonight
Like I would if you were mine
To hold forever more
And I`ll saver each touch that I wanted
So much to feel before (To feel before)
How beautiful it is
Just to be like this

I can`t fight this feeling anymore
It drives me crazy when I try to
So call my name
Take my hand
Make my wish
Baby, your command?

Only those who listens to the song will know what song is that. It’s not something you can call a romantic love story la. Well, I don’t know. depends on how you look at it perhaps. Have you ever really wanting someone so bad that you’d do anything to keep that particular person by your side all the time? I do .. Have you ever missed doing things that you do everyday, feel like you’ve made a hell of your life when you didn’t do it? .. I do .. Why is that? Like, without saying hello everyday, it can make your life like in a mess, if you forgot to do that. Well, not until that extend really .. but you feel like. He he he .. Have you ever wanting someone to be yours but what can you do is just to admire from afar. So close yet so far … he he he. I better go to bed now. But whatever it is, I’m glad that that particular person is in my life. It doesn’t have to be like I want it to be .. let it be what it is as for now. Time will tell …

I’ve been listening to that song for I think almost every minute I’m on the pc. I really like the song. My Dear Family. The way that the singers sang the song was, I cannot describe. I wished I could sing like that. It shows how much families means to them. Je kanjon-ui, saranghamnida. same goes to me too. I do feel like I’m missing now. A lot actually. When you are apart from each other for a very long time then you start to look back and say, " How I wished that I spent more time with them last time". I feel that way. Last week my dad was supposed to undergo a surgery. Nothing serious, some stones inside the bledder. But the way he SMS me was like everything was a joke. " Hey .. I’m going for operation this Thursday. Nothing serious just a little bastard stuck in my bloody bledder" - (I made that up) but it was something like that la. I was like puzzeled for a moment.Am I supposed to belive all this? Usually my dad like to joke around and I thought it was a joke, until everyone telling me the same thing. Then I called him up and ask him.

Cibol : Be serious la. You always play play one .. true or not?

Aboji : Serious la this. Did i ever joked about something like this?

yeah, a few thousand time la

Cibol : What happened ah? Serious or not the thing?

Aboji : No la, nothing serious. Got stone la inside my "kanda" (*in Iban means pundi kencing)

Cibol : Who ask you to eat suka hati. See now what happen? Take good care of your health la dy. (Yeah, I call my dad Daddy!)

Aboji : I know la. Don’t worry

Cibol : Good la. What ae you doing now?

Aboji : I’m having BBQ with your uncle, got lotsa tiger we bought. Ha ha ha …

This old man never learn …. No matter how irritating my dad can be, but sometimes I’m blessed that I have a dad like him. Understanding, funny, happy go lucky sometime so babo also la. Frankly, I’m not that attached to my dad like my sisters. They always cling with my dad. But since the second one got older, she starts to "I don’t want to go shopping with you all la. just give me the money. I go buy myself". While the other one " He he he … I better cling with daddy, he got more money than Cibol-opa". Hai .. my mom is my best buddy. Compared to my dad my mum is a lil bit sporting and don’t laugh at you when you tell her your love story. my dad ah .. " You ah? Got GF? ha ha ha ….".I guess everyone in the family have their own special thing that made up the whole family. The youngest one is more to the pain in the ass side la … being the youngest, biasa la. Above all thing, I love my family. They’re all I have in this world. Even if the world torn apart, i can always cling on them (So bulak)(*Bulak means bullshit in sarawak malay).

Prelude : Taken from www.catholic.org

Lent is a privileged time of interior pilgrimage towards Him Who is the fount of mercy.  It is a pilgrimage in which He Himself accompanies us through the desert of our poverty, sustaining us on our way towards the intense joy of Easter.  Even in the“valley of darkness” of which the Psalmist speaks ( Ps 23:4), while the tempter prompts us to despair or to place a vain hope in the work of our own hands, God is there to guard us and sustain us.  Yes, even today the Lord hears the cry of the multitudes longing for joy, peace, and love.  As in every age, they feel abandoned.  Yet, even in the desolation of misery, loneliness, violence and hunger that indiscriminately afflict children, adults, and the elderly, God does not allow darkness to prevail.  In fact, in the words of my beloved Predecessor, Pope John Paul II, there is a “divine limit imposed upon evil”, namely, mercy ( Memory and Identity, pp. 19ff. ).  It is with these thoughts in mind that I have chosen as my theme for this Message the Gospel text: “Jesus, at the sight of the crowds, was moved with pity” ( Mt 9:36). 

When we talk about lent what usually comes to our mind? - fasting and abstaining. Fasting means, eat 2 full meals and 2 half meals ( That’s what Fr. Chris told me ), no meat on Friday is what I always have in mind since I was a little child. I read a blog a few days ago, which I can’t really remember where I read it. Ha ha ha … that person was talking about doing something like abstaining from using too much of internet and also consuming alcohol or something. I said wow .. really can do that ah? I mean I can la on the alcohol part, but without internet? Noooooooooooooooooooooooo … that’s my life man.

What to abstain from? Daydreaming I guess. I daydream a lot. Ha ha ha .. I want a new phone, SAMSUNG SGH D-510

A car :

A Toyota Harrier

I had this chat with Adeline on lent, not really intirely on lent but got a bit la :

Adel : I can’t really feel the lent season la this time around (She didn’t elaborate)

Cibol : To be honest I never felt lent at all. He he he … I read this blog on abstaining from alcohol and internet. That is like .. wow an amazing thing to do, if for me la.

Adel : I know what you should abstain from la, reducing the number of SMSs that you sent to people everyday. Ha ha ha … which I doubt you can do that.

Cibol : Ha ha ha .. sure cannot la. It’s like asking me to stop watching porn ( I made that up)

Adel : I know another thing, abstain yourself from checking out gals la .. I know that’s one thing you just can’t live without. Ha ha ha .. you and cute gals. That’s so you

Guys, I have a confession to make, I can’t live without credit on my handphone. I’ll go crazy. I just love sms. Ha ha ha .. another reason why I should change to post paid. But to be honest, I’m very comfortable talking to a person on the other side without seeing that person face to face. I find that there is more things to talk about in SMS than verbal communications. I think Raph is probably correct, the real me that you can only see is when I’m singing and playing guitar. But I can’t never hide myself from that. He he he .. Happy lenten season guys. May God bless all of you …

Last week has been going very fast for me. I guess because I made full use of my time(personally and not very personal). I’m tuning in to Bo Bice’s - The Real Thing, I like it. I wonder why Carrie Underwood got the most vote. Well, doesn’t matter. This is reality. What you think the best for you doesn’t mean that it’s also the best for others. I guess that happens like almost everyday in our life. Like the other day, during meeting. We were discussing wether to have "Table Talk" or not. I thought that it’s a very nice and beneficial activity. But not for some. So, I have to open up to the council and let them decide. But lucikly, we still want to carry on with the idea.

One thing that I find a pleasure and quite a relief is that ICC is over. But still I’m, missing that summer vacation. To be honest I’m not really looking forward to the topics and stuffs like that. I’m more interested in having myself a complete free time, lean back and just enjoy. So many things that I have to think about before I went to the camp. But yeahh .. I’ve shared this one on my last post. Nuthin much to talk about I guess. have a nice week ahead guys and God bless.

Eh Cibol, why on earth your topic sounds so jiwang-ish each and everyday ah? Some of you might wonder why. To be honest, I am like that. He he he .. I might does not look like a person who is like that la. But that’s reality, I can’t change that. For those who are close enough with me will know.

I was having coffee with John and Chris just now at the back of UPM’s library. (Promote - They have nice roti canai!!). We were talking about ICC and plus other stuffs la. We did talk about exams, css and the choir in particular. (Of course we talked about girls also)

Cibol : She’s cute la, but so sayang you know, so papan like that. Back and front   also

John : Ya la, so plywood

and the conversation goes on. You no need to know the details. He he he …

What actually struck me is the level of enthusiasm that these guys have. The passion that they have for CSS actually reminds me of myself. I was having this chat with Fr. Chris a few days ago. he said that the backbone of CSS UPM are the juniors, please get hold of them. Well, I totally agree with that. As I see that the seniors are .. well, I don’t want to comment on that. (lame ass, move la).

The remind me of this wonderful journey that I had. Something that I will treasure for the rest of my life. A WALK TO REMEMBER - The movie actually tell us a lot about appreciating life, living our life to the fullest and most of all cherishing our lives with every single air that we breathe. That’s what I would like to do with my life. Seems like there’s so much to do and yet so little time.

Guys, be grateful of what you have. Cherish every moment that you have. Put heart in everything that you do because what comes from the heart touches the heart.

I felt like I’m back from my summer vacation. I enjoyed my time attending ICC. Wow! Eventhough it’s a modest camp but I would say that it was one of the best. They were not many of us but the atmosphere makes me really feel like all of us are very close knit. I seems to know everyone’s name and that was great! I was mesmerized with the spirit of the camp itself. I guess God works in his own mysterious ways. Only God knows how happy I am to be there. Coming there with a rack full of problems, heart full of hatred I find myself was at ease. I’ve never felt any better.

When we talk about vocation, we often think of preisthood and also a call to religious life. We’ve neglected the part that everything and everyone is destined and called by God to serve on any field wether religious or non-religeous … It can be anything. I’m still in a state of discovering what I’m called for.

I’ll be back with some pictures. I’ll be posting it up here.

Charles : The shooting stars might just be the sign of the success of music fest

- Thanks bro for being such a good help and a friend …

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Baby, I know you’re hurting

Right now You feel like you’ll never loved again

Now all I ask is for a chance

To prove that I love you …

Still mourning over the increase of petrol price? Don’t la. Still better than any other ASEAN countries. The only thing that I’m not happy about is, price increasing, gaji decreasing. So, it’s not good la in that sense. He he he … I don’t want to talk about that la. I don’t know much also. What I know is that I’m going to ICC in a few days time! I’m all geared up for it. This time the ICC will take place in PD. Wow .. that’s like a summer vacation! Ha ha ha .. I’m so excited about it. I don’t really care about who’s going or not, for me it’s a time to free my mind from these headaches, heartaches, ass-aches everything la. These things are driving me nuts!